Read e-book online My Planet: Finding Humor in the Oddest Places PDF

By Mary Roach

ISBN-10: 1621450716

ISBN-13: 9781621450719

From acclaimed, long island occasions best-selling writer Mary Roach comes the entire selection of her "My Planet" articles released in Reader's Digest. She was once successful columnist within the journal, and this booklet positive aspects the articles she wrote in that point. Insightful and hilarious, Mary explores the fine details of the trendy global: marriage, acquaintances, kin, nutrition, expertise, customer support, dental floss, and ants—she leaves no component to the yank adventure unchecked for its inherent paradoxes, pleasures, and foibles.

On Cleanliness:
Ed has crud imaginative and prescient, and that i don't. I don't observe dust. Ed sees it all over. i'm quite confident that Ed can truly see micro organism. . . . He confessed he didn't like me utilizing his bathrobe simply because I'd put on it whereas sitting at the toilet.
"It's in contrast to it is going within the water," I protested, although should you counted the sash as a part of the gown, this wasn't strictly true.

On the Internet:
The net is a boon for hypochondriacs like me. instantaneously, for example, I'm feeling a taking pictures soreness at the part of my neck. an online seek produces 5 suits, the 1st 3 for a situation known as Arnold-Chiari Malformation.
While my husband, Ed, reads over my shoulder, I recite indicators from the record. "'General clumsiness' and 'general imbalance,'" I say, as if saying arrivals on the Marine Corps Ball. "'Difficulty driving,' 'lack of taste,' 'difficulty feeling ft on ground.'"
"Those aren't symptoms," says Ed. "Those are your personality flaws."

On Fashion:
My husband lately made me attempt on a bikini. A bikini isn't lots a garment as a cloth-based reminder that your elements were migrating a lot of these years. My waist, i noticed that day within the dressing room, has thoroughly disappeared underneath my rib cage, which now rests without delay on my hips. I'm displaying continental flow in reverse.

On consuming Healthy:
So Ed and that i have been consuming loads of greens. greens on pasta, greens on rice. This was once tremendous fit, till you were given to the half the place Ed and that i are present in the kitchen at 10 p.m., feeding on Froot Loops and tubes of cookie dough.

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Additional info for My Planet: Finding Humor in the Oddest Places

Sample text

I’m an innocent man. You gotta help Pop-pop get outta here. Give me your hair. GEORGE MICHAEL: My hair? : Give me your hair. Give Pop-pop your hair. 37 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 38 (Mis)Communication 38 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 39 TOBIAS Oh, I can just taste those meaty leading man parts in my mouth. 39 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 40 40 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 41 MAEBY: Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the “t” on it?

37 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 38 (Mis)Communication 38 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 39 TOBIAS Oh, I can just taste those meaty leading man parts in my mouth. 39 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 40 40 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 41 MAEBY: Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the “t” on it? MICHAEL: That’s a cross. MAEBY: Across from where? 41 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 42 LUCILLE I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it.

TOUC 31 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 32 MICHAEL: You’re either going to jail, or if the judge shows absolutely no mercy at all, you’ll be staying here with my mother. 32 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 33 33 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 34 34 Arrested_Int_Layout 1 8/26/13 2:03 PM Page 35 BUSTER You lied to me. You said my father was my father, but my uncle is my father. My father is my uncle! : They’re gonna kill Grandpa. I gotta get out of here. I’m an innocent man.

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My Planet: Finding Humor in the Oddest Places by Mary Roach


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