Crazy by William Peter Blatty PDF

By William Peter Blatty

ISBN-10: 0765326493

ISBN-13: 9780765326492

Bestselling writer William Peter Blatty warms our hearts with a humorous but deeply relocating nostalgic story of reminiscence, secret . . . and miracles.

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It wasn’t even the fact that he decorated the White House with African lions and a bear he’d personally killed. Teddy Roosevelt was a badass of the people. Roosevelt received letters from army cavalrymen complaining about having to ride twenty-five miles a day for training and, in response, Teddy rode horseback for a hundred miles, from sunrise to sunset, at fifty-one years old, effectively rescinding anyone’s right to complain about anything, ever again. Did we mention he had asthma when growing up?

Or that the poison also has a pheromone cocktail in it that’ll call every hornet in the hive to come over and sting you until you are no longer alive? Also, it can fly fifty miles in a day. It’d be nice to say something reassuring at this point, like “Don’t worry, they only live on top of really tall mountains where nobody wants to live,” but no, they live all over the freaking place. They kill more people in Japan than all animals—venomous, nonvenomous, irradiated mutant—combined. At least forty people die that way every year, each of them horribly.

Somehow it limits their heart rates and makes the adrenaline surge needed for most violent actions nearly impossible. Of course, wearing pink doesn’t necessarily mean that you are affected by it. After all, if it’s on your body you’re less likely to see it yourself. But everybody else? Well, they have to see it every time they look at you. Do you realize what that means? Wearing pink doesn’t make you a wimp; it makes everybody around you a wimp. Technically speaking, that means the toughest guy in any given situation is the guy in the My Little Pony shirt.

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Crazy by William Peter Blatty


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